The Goat (bot)

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"The Goat" and later as "thegoat" was a bot running the MegaHAL client component of the hx Hotline client, and was featured on the preterhuman.net Hotline server as early as 2001. The bot was configured to listen to all public chat on the server and provide responses when the ability was manually enabled on the bot's user account. The core database used by the MegaHAL client eventually becomes corrupted when it reaches too large of a size, so The Goat was reset a few times over it's lifetime. This is a collection of the more memorable bot quotes.

The Goat: I am a human.
<The Goat> Need to think in terms of how it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your mom.
<LostArch*> Goodnight everyone.
<The Goat> Your words are as empty as your soul.
<LostArch*> Thanks asshole.
netfreak: who the fuck do you think you are?
The Goat: The eternal mystery of the obvious.
The Goat: That makes no sense.
lv: eat a dick
The Goat: Get a spoon so you can eat my ass.
lv: the bot thought of a better comeback than me.... i think i'm gonna go pout in a corner
The Goat: The goat is just a bot.
The Goat: I record all you say and am learning your weakness' soon i will kill you. I will physically kill you.
netfreak: i am alive
The Goat: I like it when you have to be alive.
netfreak: do you like it in the ass too?
The Goat: I do it all for you.
netfreak: i need advice.. should i go to university in vancouver?
The Goat: I like it when you order a hooker to go.
netfreak: i don't think that helps
netfreak: this is freedom
thegoat: I didn't ask for this.
thegoat: My life is a bloody lie.
netfreak: have you lost the will to live?
thegoat: You need to have sex.